Sometimes I wonder…

…if having a “fat day” means I’m just too darn body conscious or if I truly have some trouble areas that deserve attention.

…if friendships should be hard work to maintain (they shouldn’t).

…if marriage should be hard work to maintain (they should – more on this later).

…if I’ve gotten too loose with “eating intuitively” and hence my “fat day” feelings today.

…if I am trying to jam too many fitness goals into my plans for 2011 or not (learning to swim, tackling a tri, running another half…)

…if I am too damn Type A+++ for my own good or is that just me and at the ripe old age of 31 it’s time to either accept that or make some smart changes to get me to Type A- (I think my IRL friends will jump on the Type A- bandwagon pretty quickly…just sayin’)

…what 2011 will bring. I have a feeling that it will be, quite simply, amazing.

…if I need to revisit my series on Operation Beautiful, far too many negative self-doubt creeping into the back of my mind lately.

…why or how fitness has grown into such an integral part of my life. It sort of just happened one day, there was no a-ha moment. It’s just there. It’s defines me.

…where I’m going with this blog post, or any blog post really…I sort of just write and write and write and then I’m done.

Sometimes.

I wonder.

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24 thoughts on “Sometimes I wonder…

  1. So shall we form over-thinkers anonymous???? I think that it’s easy to over-analyze ourselves. When you start to do that, it’s easy to find those “flaws.” Maybe you are over-indulging a bit more lately, maybe not. Maybe you are just too self-critical. This is when it’s ok to stop and seriously think about it and ask yourself those tough questions and be honest with yourself. Does that make sense?

    As for the goals, I think you can go overboard with them easily when you feel like you must have them out there. Maybe it’s time to just go with the flow more? Learn to swim first and see where that takes you. I think you should come here and do the Little Rock Half with me in March πŸ˜‰

    • I’ll be the charter member of Overthinker’s Anonymous!!

      But you’re right – I’m thinking I’ll revisit this post tomorrow after I’ve thought over some of the things I’ve been “wondering” about here. In some ways, I do need to ask myself tough questions and answer them honestly, in other ways, I think I’m probably just being Overanalytic Ollie over here πŸ˜‰

      PS. Does that mean you ARE doing the half in March??? If so, I may just have to think about it…

  2. I love this, a lot of mini-blog post ideas spring to mind reading through these. I actually think both of us need to take a step back and pick one goal at a time to accomplish fitness-wise. I think it should be swimming. And that will lead to a tri. And TBD on the half…see what we can fit in first, bit by bit πŸ™‚

    • I’ll agree with you there – one at a time is ideal. I am STILL antsy to do another half (I know, you’re still a little “scarred” from it but c’mon, do it with meeee) and I really want to be able to swim at last – especially in Maine. So maybe we learn to swim, do another half and maybe find a tri to do towards the latter half of the year once we’ve mastered swimming (I use “mastered” loosely) and it’ll give us time to get into biking outside vs. just spinning, too.

      You’re right – lots of mini-blog post ideas in this post!!

  3. I can definitely relate to a lot of these- I’ve been wondering about the friendship thing, as well.I have a feeling 2011 will be great, too for some reason and I can’t put my finger on it.

    • The friendship thing is a biggie for me – I’ve learned over time that some friendships aren’t worth keeping for the pain they can inflict if they are “difficult” or not entirely “healthy” friendships to maintain. And I’ve found I’m much happier with those friends who appreciate me for who I am and don’t try to change me, “test” me or make it difficult to be friends. Know what I mean?

  4. Really good post, it made me think about friendships and fitness. Quite a few new people have come into my life in 2010 through fitness. At the same time, I’ve let some friendships drift. I wonder too what 2011 will bring. I think it’s going to be very exciting.

    • Isn’t that interesting? I totally agree and definitely can define friendships I have (both IRL and blog) who are friends of mine MAINLY because we share a love of fitness. A new trend I’ve noticed in just the past year or so even.

  5. I think if you spread those fitness goals out over time (like focus on learning to swim, then shoot for the tri, then finish with another half) you would be good.

    And I agree completely – friendships shouldn’t take a ton of work, but marriages certainly do.

    • Amen to that, Tina. Marriages are a LOT of work, but in the best possible way. If you aren’t constantly working on your marriage, to me, that’s a problem. It’s all about communicating and constantly keeping that spark alive or else it has the potential to fade over time, which is so sad. I’m a firm believer in that.

  6. Wow, I could have written half of these!

    I am definitely not type A (maybe Type B+?) πŸ˜‰ but maybe you could aim for one goal for the spring/summer, and one goal for the fall/winter? That way you wouldn’t get too overwhelmed, and you might even find that your goals changed! (Like, you might decide after swimming that you want do to an Olympic tri or something?)

    I would LOVE to hear more on your thoughts of friendship/marriage. I 100% agree. Okay…I’m not married, but! That’s what all my married friends say. πŸ™‚ And TRUE friends shouldn’t be a chore/work, it should just happen naturally…or so I’d like to think?

    • Well in that case, I’ll definitely dedicate a future post to friendship/marriage and why one should take work and the other should not. I have lots of thoughts on this πŸ™‚

  7. Don’t think of them as fat days. First of all, you are in phenomonal shape. Think of days when you clothes are uncomfortable (like for real – meaning the fit has changed, the zipper is a little snug et al – not just “i don’t like the way this looks”) as a little check and balance. You know that maybe you have been slacking on the gym or going for seconds a little too quickly. Or maybe there has been too much salt in your diet. Think of it not as “I’m huuuuuuuge” but as “something has changed ever so slightly, let me right this ship before it capsizes.” Your clothing is like a little warning system. See – positive spin!

  8. Pingback: Battling…me. « EatDrinkBreatheSweat

  9. Pingback: Sometimes, I wonder – revisited « EatDrinkBreatheSweat

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