If you could have more of anything, what would it be?

Not gonna lie, I’m feeling very good about life so far in 2011.

I am healthy and injury free, able to tackle whatever challenges (hi, Core Fusion Challenge!) I want (which I do not take for granted, especially these healthy knees!).

I have a great new job that challenges me at every turn.

I have awesome friends, an amazing husband, the best sisters.

Yet, I find myself asking myself this question:

If I could have more of anything, what would it be?

Now before I answer, I have to preface this post with this: I am grateful. Filled with gratitude. I am not complaining about the goodness in my life right now. Nor am I showing off. At all.

I’m merely an overthinker you see, and very much a Type-A, so I’m always wanting to do more, be more.

So my answer to this question?

It’s simple, really.

Time.

That’s it.

More time for everything.

My new work commute has put some serious pressure on my free time. A typical day for me lately looks something like this.

  • 5:00 and 5:20am: Wake up. Workout at home – treadmill, weight workout, or lately a Core Fusion DVD.
  • 6:30-6:45 (latest): Shower and get ready for work
  • 7:30: hop in the car, grab coffee and be on the road by 7:40 (earlier would be better given traffic…)
  • 7:30-9:00, 9:30, 10:00…get to work somewhere around here. Which is SO LATE for me. At my last job, I was ALWAYS in by 8:30 if not sooner. I liked to use that time to get settled, check out my blog, take care of urgent emails and such before settling into my day. Now I’m rushing my ass into the office, ruffled from the long commute and I HATE feeling that way. Not settling, whatsoever. I’m hoping this will pass when the snow clears…typically traffic eases as we hit spring and definitely during the summer months. But I digress.
  • 5:45-6:00 – Make my way out of the office and back on the road
  • 6:45-7:15 – home from work. This varies drastically. Usually I’m finding that the commute home is a lot better than in the AM but it all depends. It could be a 45 min drive or over an hour. It just depends. Again, hoping this clears once the weather patterns shift.
  • 7:15-10:00 – cook dinner with Scott, catch up on our day, make lunch for tomorrow. And then…either relax and catch up DVR action, read some blogs and write a blog of my own, etc.

As you can see…this schedule leaves me with so little “extra” time that I’m feeling a little bit unbalanced. And I’m struggling with that a little bit. I want to do more…of everything.

Be a better fitness nut. Yes. I said it. I want to have time for Ride and Kick, for one. Ride in the AM doesn’t get out until 7am which would put me way behind my current “schedule.” Same goes for Kick at 6:30pm…would be very hard to get there now, unless I got into work earlier and left by 5pm to maybe, just maybe slide into class just in time for it to start. I’m considering going to that class here and there and just hitting the road later, in the hopes that maybe traffic will let up. But still.

Be a better wife, disconnecting more often at night so we have true and focused “us” time during the week. Thankfully, I have an amazingly supportive husband who “gets” my blogging habit and supports it fully. But still.

Be a better co-worker. I’d love to get to work much sooner so I can spend time getting myself organized before diving into the day. Yes, I know this will come with time. I get that. But still.

Be a better friend. Call my friends more often. Make plans to catch up over dinner. I try to cram most of that into the weekends, but I could do better. A LOT better, particularly about phone calls. I know, life happens. But still.

Be a better blogger. Comment often, and in a timely manner. I try SO hard to do this and am still doing it now. But it’s tough to squeeze in. I love this community and want to do my part. Not just on this blog but on your blogs, too. This goes for twitter too, something I haven’t had as much time for, either. I know…you get it and still love me (right??). But still.

At the end of the day, I know…this balance stuff will come with time as I settle into my new schedule but I always want to do more, be more, more, more. And I guess what I’m trying to say is that I don’t know how to give myself some leeway. Permission to let things go that I can’t fit into my day here and there. And truly be ok with that.

While I continue to mull this over…is there anything you wish you had more of?

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19 thoughts on “If you could have more of anything, what would it be?

  1. you’re right. i wish i could have more time…although, i would say it sounds like i have more time than you, with that awful commute! i’d also wish for more low-calorie, sugar free chocolate that actually tastes good!

  2. Patience. I need more patience.

    I need to be patient with my knee. With my PhD (no rhyme intended!). With other people’s issues and confusions, which they’re working through, just like me.. (whoa, I really am in a rhyming mood today!)

    I’m such a perfectionist, which is a real pain in the butt. Because it so often makes me dissatisfied with things as they are right now, and so I push to make them better, and then I get frustrated that it’s not happening RIGHT NOW.

    So yeah; patience.

  3. I don’t know that I need more of any one thing (unless people are handing out cash – haha!) but I would love to have a more carefree approach to life. I want to go with the flow, enjoy small moments, and simple experiences without fretting over little things.

    • I agree with you – I think that’s partly my problem too. I’m craving SUCH structure that it’s killing balance, killing my ability to feel more carefree. I think if I approached my day less structured, even just a little bit, I’d probably be happier – well, I KNOW I’d be much happier. I have a really hard time “flowing” and I’d love to find a way to get better at that.

  4. You have the right idea sis, you are nipping the ahhhh I have no balance freak-out in the bud and smartly choosing your options. And hey, on sister dinner Mondays, I don’t mind if you want to blog and read some blogs too 😉 (and I agree with others here who say PATIENCE is one thing they struggle with….um, me too).

  5. Pingback: Small victory, little joys « EatDrinkBreatheSweat

  6. Um. Did you read my mind!?!?!?! Seriously…this post is absolutely 100% something that could have come out of my head. It would most definitely be TIME for me, and every “be a better…” comment? SAME. HERE. I couldn’t have said it any better myself. Just know that you’re definitely not alone in wanting to be a better anything. I think it’s a healthy desire…it keeps us going, right? It keeps us striving for more…

  7. Oh my gosh, Jess…..that is ONE jam packed schedule. Seriously, you are a superstar!!

    My mom always said someone told her “Everyone has the same 24 hours in a day.” And yes, I know this is true…but it’s just fact that there are some people who spend more time working and commuting than others – and that is a large chunk of our day! I do hope and pray that, like you said, the traffic troubles ease up very soon and you are given some extra (much needed) time!

    I’m with Susan….I’ll take my prince, please. 🙂

    • I know…when I was writing it all out, even I was like daaaamn, I’m kinda busy. LOL.
      But you’re right, it’s all good and it WILL ease up over time, I’m sure of it. I’m still lookin’ for those patience pants, though!

  8. Pingback: Core Fusion Challenge week #2, walking tall(er) « EatDrinkBreatheSweat

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