11 miles closer…

…to 13.1 

Yup, Saturday was our last long run of our training in preparation for the Green Strides half marathon next weekend! Weee! 😉

And, I have to say, despite 40 mph wind gusts and a hip that started to bug me about halfway through the run, I was amazed that the 11 miles seemed to fly by. I feel the most conditioned I have ever felt as a runner – and it’s for this reason that I am totally and utterly excited to “meet” 13.1 again next weekend.

So this “most conditioned” feeling I mention? It feels so great. I feel privileged to feel so strong and ready to rock this race.

…but I almost  feel *too* privileged, somehow. Almost like I don’t deserve it or something. Or that I’m on the verge of an injury or something else horrible that would prevent me from continuing on this runner’s high I’ve been loving the past few months. Sort of like the “waiting for the other shoe to drop” mentality. And that’s the one thing I do not like about this whole thing. It’s a weird feeling, and it sort of crept up out of the blue after our run. Dislike.

So why am I suddenly letting fear come into play? Why am I suddenly feeling like I haven’t earned this and/or don’t deserve this? I sure as hell have been working my ass off for this race, for the last race, for all of it. Why now?

I don’t know.
And I don’t care. 

After Saturday’s long run when these thoughts started to creep in, I made myself a promise: do not let self-doubt in. Not now. Not ever.

Instead – let’s look at October 23 as the pay-off of all this hard work and commitment and let’s celebrate that. It’s earned. It’s deserved.  It’s something you’ve more than worked for. Don’t back down now. Finish what you started. 

So 13.1? I’m coming for you. And if I were you, I’d watch your back.
Just sayin’.

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25 thoughts on “11 miles closer…

    • You are right – I do feel like I trained for this smartly and am SO ready for Sunday to hurry up and get here!! The weather is supposed to be perfect for it too – 58 and sunny!

  1. Love love love. And I do kind of know what you mean though. I mean, I don’t feel like I ran 13 miles this weekend other than the sciatica issue which can be the same even at 4 miles. So recovery is fantastic so, then I start to wonder and over think a bit. And I shouldn’t. Just go with it and enjoy the fact that you are ready for this race!

    • I had a feeling you might get where I was coming from with these “fears” that cropped up over the weekend. I mean, I KNOW I totally appreciate the fact that I am able and fit and strong to run these miles, but I sometimes worry that I take it for granted somehow, in spite of myself. Even though I *know* I fully appreciate it. Does that make any sense at all??

  2. You are going to kick serious butt on Sunday!!! Enjoy every moment of it…life is too short to worry about what may happen or to have self doubt. You’ve been smart about your training & that makes a huge difference!!! Breathe the Newburyport air, enjoy the sites, revel in the cheers, & smile like a crazy lady when you cross the finish line. Regardless of the time, the fact that you can get out there and run is an amazing gift 🙂

    • You summed up exactly how I want to face this race on Sunday – with a goofy grin on my face the entire time. Running happy and strong and proud. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy and excited about race day as I am right now. It feels so good. And you’re right – it is an amazing gift, and one that I truly cherish everyday.

  3. Its amazing how 1 run can just make everything seem so nice!! Something tells me that you’re ready to own this race this weekend!!! I can’t wait to read the race report.

  4. That’s the “feeling” of a seasoned Half-marathoner! Don’t question the veteran status – you’re going to run confidently and STRONG.

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