So the past few months I’ve been struggling a bit with the cadence of this blog. Struggling with it so much so that it caused me to start to question who I am as a blogger.
I was struggling with my voice.
For what seemed like forever (er, 18 weeks), I was blogging almost 100% of the time about running. Training for Chicago was a huge, huge, huge focus for me…for #teamsutera, and I was finding myself, my thoughts, my voice, pretty consumed with it. And not that that was a bad thing at all — because it certainly was not: training for Chicago continues to be one of the proudest times in my life, and one of the most memorable experiences I have ever shared with my husband…y’know, aside from our wedding day, maybe. 😉 But it was because I was so focused on that end goal, that finish line, that 26.2 that awaited #teamsutera on October 7, that it was really all I found my voice focused on.
After that huge, huge, huge high? Well, the dust settled. I found myself almost feeling as if the marathon never happened (talk about run-amnesia, like whoa), and I started to wonder what my purpose was on the blog and where I was going next, or where I should go next. And well, I still don’t have *that* answer, (sorry, friends!) I do think I have the answer on what my voice sounds like.
My voice: it’s grateful, proud and loyal.
I am grateful for this life I’ve both built for myself through hard work and as much dedication as I can muster, and for the blessings that have landed at my feet — making me feel utterly grateful and joyful that I am so watched over by Him.
I am proud of who I’ve evolved into: someone who openly shares her motivation, her dedication, her determination, her passion, and does so with joy and pride and courage. I’ve always tried to be as honest and true on this blog as I am in real life and I SO hope that comes through in my voice, truly.
I am (fiercely) loyal to my loves: my husband, my sisters, my friends, my family.
So that’s, I guess, what I’m trying to get at here: my voice in real life is the very same ‘voice’ I try to speak with here on this blog. Everything I do, everything I strive for, everything I believe in, I openly share here — not in an attempt to be this super inspirational bloggy type at all, but because this simply is me. If I happen to inspire you just by being me? Well damn, that’s seriously just awesome…and far more than I could ever ask for from this blog of mine.
(wow, I’m rambling, sorry friends, I swear I have a point.)
So today, I’m here recommitting to this blog, in my own voice, in whatever shape and form this voice of mine takes me — running, walking, skipping, jumping, plie-ing towards my next adventure...whatever that may be, because God knows, I have no idea what that looks like yet (!). And I’m totally ok with that right now.
My voice: it’s me.
…take me or leave me, friends.
I may not always have the time to comment, but i’m always reading and love whatever thoughts you put out there. Your voice is certainly all those things, just as you are. And I’m proud to call you my friend. 🙂
i totally agree with tina! and sometimes our inner voices needs to be still for a while, to gather and restore those thoughts. Coming off a marathon high is hard. You have to shift you focus back to what your REAL purpose is… which is this. YOU! Loyal, proud, grateful!
couldn’t agree with these two ladies more! xoxo friend. we love you!
xoxo Linds and Linds, love you two!!!
Ahh Linds, your words get me EVERY single time. Seriously — how do you always know how to put into words EXACTLY what my heart is thinking but my voice isn’t able to articulate?? Seriously, you are my mental sherpa through and through. xoxo!
Aww Tina!! You are the sweetest, I heart you SO!! Thank you — I know you’re always reading, just like I’m always reading even if not commenting. I have found such strength and perspective from you this past year, SO happy to call you a real friend, truly.
I haven’t commented before but wanted you to know that your voice inspires me to just enjoy the process of being healthy, to be grateful for all my body allows me to do and to let the run/workout renew my spirit. Thank you for taking the time to share your voice with us.
Wow. YOU are why I come back to blogging time and time again — the voices that remain silent but read along every single time I post and take something away from it. Voices I often NEVER hear from. So to hear from you and to hear that I’ve inspired you in some shape or form? HUGE. I am SO glad you shared your voice with me. Please stick around 🙂
I adore your voice. That’s why I read!
And I adore yours my dear 🙂
When I finally reached the “I’m proud of what I evolved into” place it was life altering.
xoxo
I agree with everyone here, but really identify with what Miz has to say here…pride in where my life has evolved to – SUCH a life altering moment. Love that your life is in that very same spot sis, you deserve it 🙂 XOXO
I totally identify with Miz on that too…it has been a pretty life-altering feeling I’ve been having these past few months, it’s crazy to finally be in a place of total comfort-in-my-own-skin and just so very happy with how life is shaping up. I truly believe half of that has to do with perspective vs. having a ‘perfect’ life though, you know? I think we’ve both come far in gaining new perspective, seeing life in a new way and just going for it more, you know?
It HAS been life-altering Miz…couldn’t have said it better myself.
I don’t think your voice has changed. Just the things you blog about, which is natural as different things happen in your life.
That’s true…I just started to feel like my voice was kind of silent in a way, I just struggled with what to say next that would even matter. I started overthinking the whole blogging thing I think. But now that I’ve taken a step back I can see that my blog doesn’t have to ‘be’ a certain thing, it can ebb and flow just like life ebbs and flows, right?
i can’t wait to hear more of your voice in 2013!!!! 🙂
And I promise to share more of it in 2013 🙂 xo!
I’m with Tina – I think your voice always comes through even if you might not think so. It’s why you have so many amazing, supportive blogger friends my dear!
awww big hugs friend, biiig hugs!!
don’t go changin’!
we love you jess -otherwise, we wouldnt keep reading&following your blog…you are sweet&special!
…none of us know where the future will take us but sometimes that’s part of the fun&excitement especially when we look back at our year&reflect!
I’m not going anywhere, don’t you worry 🙂
You are absolutely right — the path before us is very much blind, and that truly IS half the fun of it, just learning to roll with it and embracing the surprises around the bend vs. fearing them.
I still enjoy reading your blog more than ever! I have never run a marathon, but I do not fully believe you when you say the dust has settled after Chicago 😉 you ran a marathon!!!!!!! Can’t wait to keep reading in 2013.
haha you don’t fully believe me huh? 😉
Funny that you write this because out of all the blogs that I read (and there are way too many to count!), your voice is one of my favorites. It’s honest, consistent, inspiring, true, confident, humble, and strong. Your character shines through my dear and I love our *chats* on here and coming to read for my own motivation, food for thought, support and friendship that you offer. Thank you for that!
I’d have to say that the feeling is MORE than mutual my dear — I always find your voice to be so true and full of faith and strength, it leaves me speechless half the time after reading your posts. I am SO SO SO glad our paths crossed, so very glad.
I was just thinking about you this morning and your comment to me about blogging! I can honestly say, you are one of the most inspirational people I know. I love your voice and I love your honesty!
Aw friend, you are the sweetest! To say that I inspire you or that I inspire ANYONE out there feels so crazy to me — but if I honestly am inspiring you in some shape or form, well — that just makes me SO HAPPY. I’m so glad we ‘met’ through blogging my dear — I’ve loved following along as you fall deeper and deeper in love with running, it’s just awesome to see 🙂
I love this Jess, good for you for sticking with your true voice. I think these genuine, honest posts (that you so often capture) are the best kinds of posts a blogger can offer. Love you honesty & genuine attitude as usual Jess! Also, great quote at the end : )
You totally inspire me by just being you. That’s the thing – that is your voice and your journey no matter if it’s training for Chicago, teaching barre or just simply living your life. It’s genuine and real and that’s what connects with people. Definitely why I love reading your blog Jess!
Two weeks ago I wrote a journal entry titled, “My Blogging Voice” because I’ve been struggling with the same thing too (hence my lack of posts). I look forward to reading whatever you decide your voice to be because it’s always so uplifting!
good for you girlie! I’m not quite sure what direction I want to take my own blog in the new year but who cares ha For now, it’s just about enjoying the holidays! Always love your posts JEss!