Patterns: a progress report

So apparently, it took a big ‘ol b*tch slap from Mother Nature to get me to truly step back and re-asses those patterns I talked about last week. You might remember that post — the one where I admit that I struggle to let go, to allow myself chill time, to turn off the go-go-go mentality I have.

Welp — this happened over the weekend:

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Yup, totally snowed in from about noon on Friday until 4pm on Sunday when I broke free to teach a barre n9ne class (we wound up adding a few to the schedule on Sunday since we had to cancel Friday night and all Saturday classes.)

Once I heard the forecast for the blizzard, two things happened: first — I laughed at God’s sense of humor. Does He know how to force my hand or what? And then — I promised myself and my sister (and the hubs!) that I’d vow to DO LESS this weekend. To stop focusing on filling up all the free time I was suddenly granted with, and to start focusing on letting go and just being. Afterall, my weekend was originally going to be quite different had the storm not clobbered us. I had a full morning of classes at the studio planned for Saturday, a night out with friends on Saturday night and then a FULL DAY of training for Pound on Sunday (at a studio an hour-and-a-half away). So when I wound up not having ANY of those plans on my plate? You can imagine the internal battle that was *thisclose* to going off in my head.

But, I’m proud of myself, actually. I pushed down the urge to do all of the “need to do” items on my mental check list and focused on the “want to do” items, instead.

Like a pedicure with my sis, pre-blizzard on Friday (I took Friday off from work, originally to get sh*t done since I was feeling so stressy last week…again, can anyone else see God’s humor here?). Because pre-blizzard pedicures are *such* a necessity, am I right?? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Like snuggling under blankets with Scott with a drink in hand (yep, ‘day’ drinking at it’s finest!), and reading a new book I picked up on Friday before the snow picked up.

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Like playing in the snow like a bunch of teenagers, and feeling quite amazed at the beauty and power of the storm that surrounded us. Snow drifts taller than either of us, one of our cars totally snowed in and buried. And the tackle from Scott while I was attempting to shovel, it made me giggle like I haven’t giggled in awhile. Of course, I promptly returned the favor and tackled him back afterwards, but that’s besides the point. ๐Ÿ˜‰

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(Oh — and we also managed to pull off another #b9poseadaychallenge on Instagram, this time we called it the #b9poseadaysnowedin challenge where we asked clients to attempt their best pose while out in the snow. Here’s my attempt at glutes at the barre:)

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Like drinking good wine, continuing our rummy war tradition (I continue to lose almost every time, btw), savoring a delicious snowed-in date night on Friday and another snowed-in date night on Saturday, complete with two movie rentals on-demand, lots of snuggling, and yep, lots of wine drinking (I mean really, what else is there to do in a snow storm??).ย 

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Now. I’m not trying to paint a rosy picture here, I am not perfect. There were moments this weekend where my go-go-go side wanted to come out to play. I desperately pushed ‘her’ away. I didn’t want her to come out and ruin this chance to reset ย my brain a little bit. But, yes — there were moments when I thought “I should go build some playlists for class” or “maybe I should wash the floors, they are looking a little messy from the snow.” But I promise you, the only productive thing I did this weekend was run on the treadmill and do some abs and I suppose you can count baking cookies and low fat brownie bites as ‘productive’ so sure, I’ll toss that into the list too.

But overall? If I’m giving myself a grade for this progress report of mine — I’d give myself a solid B. Not a C — that would be average and I feel I’ve done better than average with ample room to grow. And definitely not an “A” because as you can see, I definitely have work to do and am probably never going to be one of those truly laid-back types that can toss aside to-do lists completely.

But that’s ok.
It’s just not who I am.
I am me, ย a perfectly imperfect me, at that.

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31 thoughts on “Patterns: a progress report

  1. YAY!! I am so glad you really took this time and took a look at your patterns and tendencies and are trying to break them, just a wee bit. YES I had to remind you, gently, a few times, let’s admit it, over the weekend, but you honestly did an awesome job, I am very proud of you sis ๐Ÿ™‚
    Signed,
    Tough Love Tess (aka Jolene) – LOL.

  2. Nothing like Mother Nature to force the down time! TPersonally, I think that this is something that many of us struggle with, and probably will for a long time, because that’s just the nature of our personalities – driven! But I also think once you (we) recognize that it’s something you want to work on, you’re already have way there.

    And I love the barre in the snow challenge!

  3. So proud of you! Sounds like a great weekend! And speaking from experience I can assure you that the more you do what you did this weekend the easier it becomes. Before you know it you’ll be like…wash the floors or relax? RELAX! Can’t wait to meet you this week!

    • I KNEW you’d be proud of me for this — especially considering how you’ve reformed your former Type-A ways in a BIG way this year. You are my hero. If you can do it, I can do it right?? So excited to meet you in just a couple of hours!!

    • It was NOT easy. I had to constantly force my mind to stop rolling back into that habit of go-go-DO and allow myself to be swept up into ‘me’ moments and lots of fun time with Scott. After a day or so of consciously working on it, it DID get easier, but definitely something I have to REALLY focus on or I’ll totally fall back into old habits.

  4. I am so glad you got a break. I am terrible at just detaching. I also feel the need to constantly be checking off that to do list. I admit- I was pretty guilty of that all weekend and it didn’t make for the best time snowed in! I may have to take a page out of your new book and give myself a moment.

    • This is EXACTLY how I’d normally treat a snowed-in weekend: an opportunity to CRAM as much into that free time as possible. Without an ounce of thought given to chill time, ‘me’ time, or ‘fun’ time really. And you know what? This weekend showed me that I need to STOP thinking go-go-go all the time and start striking a better balance between productivity and plain ‘ol fun. Life is too short!! I hope you’ll give yourself a moment too, you deserve it!

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